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How we helped Jaspal – in his own words

Hungari is a Punjabi word from India, which is about pride. And what this has experience has taken that away from me in a good way, so I'm not too proud not to talk about the problem. We was okay. We had bought a house, we had a mortgage, little girl.

We were buying things, things were brand new. My wife works in a warehouse, it was only until she had an accident and broke her leg and then had to leave work that really that level of income dropped which exposed the debt that we had. I did have three credit cards where I was just transferring them back and forth. It wasn't decreasing.

So that's when it really kind of hit home.

And I was maintaining the payment but it really left us short at the end of each month. You're just stripped back to your bare minimum and that's a real hard thing to take. Because at that time I was kind of really dealing with it by myself. So the loans I got in touch with said I'm really struggling, what can we do? And they said well, We want payment, what can you afford? They just wanted the money, they didn't really empathise. The mental health, I really did think we'll lose the house and everything because we just couldn't manage it.

I need to find a solution, something that works for me as a person and the family, but it doesn't mean I have to give up everything. I can't afford to give up everything. I didn't want to start all over again. I just cannot handle this.

So then I contacted StepChange. After a couple of years, it was a regular payment, I was making it and I just felt it started to ease off a little bit. When they did your budget, they factored in life changing. So as children's expenses grow, the budget would reflect your lifestyle, which is why you do it yearly.

So it made the burden less, so you can enjoy your time being a parent. And when I seen the, you know, statements and the debt coming down, one came off and another came off and you're like, I'm achieving something. I just persevered and got through it. And it was great after ten years to just say, like, I'm debt free.

But we learnt a lot through that whole experience. They say that to raise a child, you need a community of people, so you can't do it in isolation. And that's what I realised with debt. To solve a debt problem you need a community to sort it.

You can't do it by yourself. StepChange is a community of people that support you, to help you to do that.

“Up until a few years ago, my wife and I were doing ok financially and had accumulated a fair amount of credit card debt, but we were able to manage it fine. However, when my wife broke her leg, she wasn’t able to work the night shifts that she’d been doing in a warehouse to keep us afloat.

“We had a child and a mortgage to worry about, and decided to move money around on a few different 0% credit card offers to keep our heads above water for the time being. We kept this up for a while, but things were still daunting.”

Feeling shame and pressure

“At one point, whilst I was temporarily out of work, I became convinced that we were going to lose everything. I felt like the debt was a weight trapping me and that I didn’t have a way out.

“I didn’t tell any of my family due to the shame I was feeling, but also because I felt a kind of pressure from male provider culture to ensure the future for my wife and child. At one point, I even rang our insurance to ask if they cover suicide.”

Don’t suffer in silence

Experiencing mental health issues can easily worsen feelings of panic and helplessness if you are in debt. Find out more about how to get debt and mental health support.

Now life is back on track

“Things finally took a positive turn once I got in touch with StepChange. By this point, I’d been targeted by an IVA lead generator but I wasn’t convinced that going insolvent was the solution I was looking for, and I needed some advice.

“With StepChange, I put together a budget and worked out what I could afford to pay back each month. Around this time, we had a second child and the costs of everything was going up, so we chose to really cut back to maximise the amount we could put towards the debt.

“I started to feel more secure as I chipped away at the debt, and slowly I started to feel like I was back to living my life again.”

Life after becoming debt free

“I knew it was going to be a long journey, but now that I’m debt free, I don’t feel at risk anymore. The day that I made my final payment the relief was amazing.

“I’ve learned a lot thanks to the process and I feel very lucky to have been supported the whole time. There was always someone on the other end of the phone to talk (or cry!) to and who would help communicate with my creditors on my behalf.

“The yearly reviews were amazing, and I even benefitted from being referred to Mind and Samaritans for some help with my mental health.

“I’d like to tell people out there to talk about it. Worry less. There’s light at the end of the tunnel and StepChange are with you every step of the way.”

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